Tuesday, 28 June 2011

When loved ones are apart, don't they miss each other more as time go by? Won't they want to keep in touch often? Won't they long for their loved ones to be near? Or is this idea only true in my head?

Because so far, the longer I am away from home, the lesser I am needed home.

Friday, 24 June 2011

Of lists and inspirations

I'm a list-maker. In fact, I have a whole booklet dedicated to making lists: movies to watch, groceries to buy, places to visit, tasks to do for the day. And the delicious feeling of satisfaction when crossing off the written items just soothes my heart.

Today's inspiration came from the video below...

I want to be that man flappin' like a mad chicken in all those different places. I want to explore, be adventurous, live life to the full and knit each experience together into stories I can tell my grandchildren.

Right in the middle of the video I had a lightbulb moment. I should make a list! A list of things I want to do, places I want to see, adventures I want to experience...so I'll never forget. So I can cross them off. So when I'm older, I won't look back and regret the times I should've done them, but never did. My own bucket list.

Wednesday, 22 June 2011

Slipping into peaceful existance

Currently, I'm in a state of ignorance and mind-numbing peace which I wish to record to remind myself of this...lovely feeling.

Am I on drugs, I hear you ask. Oh, nearly so. Stashed away in my drawers are sleeping pills for long flights which I have been intending to use to calm my sleepless nights brought upon by stress, paranoia, nightmares and the dreadful summer heat. But no, I haven't taken them yet.

It's that final realisation that your life is not meant to be permanently bound to constant pressure, pain and disappointment.

For example, exam times, which everybody can relate. As the dates draw nearer, I grow increasingly panicky, frantically trying to cram every single last detail into my exhausted brain. Sleeping hours grow shorter, anxiety attacks become more frequent. And then, right at the last moment, I drift into a welcoming state of calmness. I like to call the this moment the 'f*ck-it' state. The weight just lifts of your shoulders because you know you've done the best you can. Or more crudely put, I don't give a rat's ass any more.

That's where I'm at right now, but not as a consequence of an exam. This is the aftermath of an argument. Oh yes, the 'f*ck-it' state applies to most any stressful event. Like any physiological system, the process can be staged. First there's the adrenaline rush of anger followed by a dull stress fuelled with corticosteroids due to or lead by sadness and disappointment. Finally, we reach the 'f*ck-it' state.

In this state, I am mentally screaming with a haughty air "Bring it on, world! Do your worst!" Because I really don't give a *beeeeep* what happens.

Tuesday, 7 June 2011

Year 3 over

It's official...My appetite disappears when I'm stressed.

26 hours without food, 34 hours without sleep, 15 minutes of hell during my presentation, 4 months of freedom!!!

I feel...thirsty.

Wednesday, 1 June 2011

Tea Jello

What do we do when we have copious amounts of castor sugar, powdered gelatin and loose tea leaves?

Oh...it ain't a regular cuppa with 2 lumps of sugar

I made TEA JELLY!!!

This batch was made with 'Tie Guan Yin' loose tea leaves.

Mmm...Edible tea =) Refreshing with a subtle perfume-y fragrance

Before I forget, perhaps I should try milk tea jelly served with evaporated milk or sweet coffee jelly with evaporated milk...No WAIT...coffee jelly with a splash of Baileys...*drool*