A new addition

Meet Whiskey. 

After a traumatising bath

I know, she's adorable. She hops instead of run!

Ready to hop off

We got her for RM3 (a very tiny price to pay to give a kitten a good chance in life) at the central market. Reason: To catch vermin (which is the excuse I use so my parents would let me get a kitten!)

Unfortunately, RM3 was not the only price I had to pay (well, not including kitty food and toys). My immune system has come to hate cats. Tiny scratches will swell and itch. There will be unending sneezing, itchy nose and eyes and nasal congestion. Those are easily controlled though, with loratidine once a day.

The wheezing and coughing however, are a little troublesome. I've come to accept that I have an exacerbation after a week of dosing myself to the brim with salbutamol. My paediatrician (yes, I still see her despite being the ripe ol' age of >18) told me to stay away from the cat and gave me 3 days worth of steroids to control my allergies.

But who can stay away from that cute lil' face. So I got myself a couple of surgical masks, a brand new inhaler and played away! We've taken to calling her "Whiz" now. Short for Whiskey, obviously, but how ironic that it sounds like 'wheeze'.

Mom said I'm stubborn and warned me of friends who ignored warnings about their health. They've passed on now. Perhaps I should be more wary. Don't wanna be growing muscles and mustaches from having to constantly take steroids.

Every once in a while the barrier is weakened.

You forget the reason you had to be strong. You give up on trying to fight for whatever you're fighting for. You give in to the very forces that denies you peace.

There are times all that I've done wrong just comes crashing down on me: my regrets, my wrong choices, my wrong-doings.

Most days, I am able to reason with myself to ensure that I have made the right choices, that what's done is done, that I can learnt from the past.

But sometimes, I just wish I was a completely different person, who have chosen a different path in life.

On a day like this, I wonder who could ever love me for who I am, other than God.

Who could genuinely love a person with so many flaws when there are better people to love in the world?